'We have one rule - don't let the cats outside': 70-year-old live-in aunt lets the domestic cats out in the forest, despite repeated requests from her bills-paying 32-year-old niece

Author image for Ayala Sorotsky
Ayala Sorotsky • Writer and Editor
Dec 8, 2025 2:00 PM EST

We're not saying we're mad at a person that we've never met, but… yes. Yes, we do. We're very mad at this old lady and her disregard for the cats' well-being. They're not her cats, but she has lived with them for about five years. That's five years filled with feline delight and floofy happiness. You'd expect that after five years of living in a house with cats, the live-in person will develop some kind of cordial relationship with the cats, at least. But, buffleingly enough, not in this case.

When you hear about an old lady, mostly the phrase "sweet old lady" comes to mind. Well, not in this case. We're talking about a 70-year-old live-in aunt for the past five years - who doesn't pay any rent, who never takes care of the bills, and repeatedly breaks the one rule the niece and her boyfriend set - don't let the cats out. But she lets them out all the time. Not "forgot the door open and the cat ran out, oops" sort of rule-breaking. More like "I just let the cat out again, knowingly, consciously, even if you asked me not to many times, for many reasons". Yeah.

Are we mad? Yes, we are. You don't just compromise a cat's safety because you feel like it. Especially if the outside of that specific house you live in is very unfriendly to cats. We think any cat pawrent would agree - if our cat's safety is compromised, we'd do anything in our power to prevent that from happening. Every cat pawrent cares for their cat's safety.

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  • 01
    She's (70 y.o. F) been living with us (me 32 F and my bf 27 M) for 5 years or so.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 02
    We have one rule - don't let the cats outside. She doesn't listen. I've tried everything.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 03
    old lady with a weird wide smile, wearing floral pattern shirt, staring right at the camera
    via SilviaJansen

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 04
    I have tried talking to her calmly. I've tried getting angry. I've tried sitting down beside her and crying real tears while talking about how if something happens and they get hurt outside I can't afford the vet bills.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 05
    I've tried writing it down in a letter because she constantly interrupts when anybody tries to talk so I thought maybe if I wasn't physically speaking she wouldn't get that chance to interrupt and it would actually sink in since she seems incapable of listening using her ears.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 06
    I've tried getting my dad (her brother) to talk to her in case maybe she would listen to him.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 07
    We live in an area on the far edge of town and our back yard is FOREST.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 08
    couple and their cat looking out of the window on a beautiful day
    via Imageblend

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 09
    On the back yard cam I've seen coyotes, black bears, neighborhood dogs getting out of their fences, birds of prey, cars going by on the road not to mention ticks and lice that they can AND HAVE brought back into the house.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 10
    I've explained this until I'm blue in the face and she Does. Not. Listen. About a month ago she let the cats out at sundown and didn't bother to get them in, she just went to bed.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 11
    My bf went downstairs to use the restroom at about 4 in the morning and the poor baby was crying on the back porch to be let in.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy

  • Seeing a cat begging to be let inside is a heartbreaking sight. Definitely when it's a stray, trying to get themselves adopted into a warm home, but especially when the cat belongs in the house - and can't get back inside.

  • 12
    cat on a snowy wooden porch, looking a little scared, stares at something outside of frame
    via Margarita Shchipkova

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 13
    And after 5 years he finally lost his temper on her. We are talking about a very sweet man who has never lost his temper with this woman, but he's 6'5 and when he does decide to stand on business it can be scary.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 14
    The next day she was visibly shaken said she will never let them out again, she's done.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 15
    I privately told my boyfriend "yeah she will be good for about 2 weeks but just you watch.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 16
    She will start doing it again. She always does." She left our place before Thanksgiving to go visit her son.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 17
    I got home at 9 AM after my night shift and on my way home I see that one of my neighbors dogs has gotten out again.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 18
    He was running down the road. I'm an animal lover and I'm sure he's a perfectly nice doggy but all dogs have a prey instinct and want to chase things that are smaller than them, like my cat.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 19
    cat outside looking scared of something ourside of frame
    via GoodLifeStudio

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 20
    So alarm bells are going off. I let myself into the house, observed that she had already left for her trip and did my daily inventory of "where are the pets and are they okay".
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 21
    Surprise sur- fuckin'-prise - looks like one of them isn't in the house. I can't find her.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 22
    So I called my aunt asking where Cookie is (cats name) to see if maybe she was just hiding somewhere in the house and my aunt said oh I let her out.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 23
    cranky old lady smoking in bed, rollers on her head, mean expression, wearing floral pattern pyjamas
    via jashlock

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 24
    And I said OH GREAT BECAUSE THERE'S A BIG BLACK DOG RUNNING WILD THROUGH OUR YARD" and hung up
    via Se*yJudgeJudy

  • Realizing your cat is in immediate danger is a feeling we wish no other cat pawrent will ever experience. It's a horror in the heart. We feel for this cat mom, we'd get angry, so angry, if we were her.

  • 25
    Not only did she let the cat out like we have been telling her not to for years but she actually left the house without bothering to bring her back inside.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 26
    cat outside looking alert, ears perked and back straight, looking at something outside of the frame
    via Vlad from Pexels

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 27
    Not even there to supervise. Not even leaving a note for us to let us know we need to get her in.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 28
    Just let her outside and bounced. Not her problem I guess she thinks. It is very difficult to make me angry so I feel a little unreasonable for getting so pissed off at this...
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 29
    but from my perspective, it's so disrespectful. It's the ONLY rule we have. She doesn't respect my wishes.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 30
    She doesn't respect my decisions or my word as an adult. She clearly doesn't respect my time or my effort working 52 hrs a week, because she's been explicitly told that she's putting me in danger of having to drain my entire bank account to pay emergency vet bills.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 31
    She doesn't respect that I pay her way by letting her live here for free, she doesn't respect my boyfriend and his wishes either.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 32
    She claims she loves us but I feel like her actions show nothing but a lack of care for me, my mental state, my emotional state, my financial well- being, and I don't even want to look at her any more.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 33
    All I feel is disgust and rage and contempt towards her and it's completely eroded our relationship.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 34
    When I was a kid she was my favorite aunt. As an adult I think she's a hypocritical, disrespectful, inconsiderate, selfish waste of space.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 35
    It's a shame. At the bottom of the issue it is simple - she lets the cats out when we've told her not to.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 36
    But to me I feel like it shows SO MUCH MORE underneath that simple action. So you guys tell me - am I overreacting for getting so damn mad about this?
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 37
    cat outside, walking towards the camera
    via Murad asafrah from Pexels

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 38
    Thank you all for commenting and sharing your thoughts and ideas. I'm gonna close the comments now because I've got my answer - I'm definitely not overreacting and need to take some steps to transition her to a new living situation, with somebody who isn't me!
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 39
    Thank you all again. I appreciate you all. All cats are safe and she's gone till after Christmas so I'll make a plan of action during this time.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 40
    Due_Association_5128 NOR. Put her outside and see how she likes it.
    via Due_Association_5128
  • 41
    OP S Judge Judy I'm not gonna lie, I've been considering it. She goes out to smoke every night and I've been fantasizing of locking the door, and telling her I'll come back at 4 AM so she can stay out and see how it feels to not be able to get in for that long. If it wasn't my dad's name on the mortgage she would already be out. I'm to the point that I'm about to start calling her children behind her back and telling them they need to do something to step up for their mom because she's not welco
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 42
    writing_mm_romance Time for this woman to find alternative accommodations. You've taught her that you'll never actually do anything when she shits on your boundaries, so she has no reason to change. YOU are the one who needs to change by enacting consequences. This is her verbal warning - one more misstep with your pets, and she gets a pink slip in the form of an eviction notice.
    via writing_mm_romance
  • 43
    OP SOyJudge Judy You know what's funny? She has Lyme disease now because one of the cats brought in a tick and it infected her. So she has had consequences. Not from me though. I legally can't kick her out. (To my understanding anyways, am I wrong about that?) Even though I pay 100% of the bills it's my dad's name on the deed and the mortgage. With only 3 more years to pay off the mortgage and the insane interest rates right now it doesn't make sense to refinance their mortgage in my name. So I'
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 44
    old lady talking, her hand in motion as if she's explaning something to someone out of frame
    via halfpoint

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 45
    Bahterypowahh I would keep the cats locked in a separate room temporarily for the time it takes to evict her. Does she have any explanation for her blatant disrespect?
    via Bahterypowahh
  • 46
    OP SOyJudge Judy She doesn't give an explanation, just excuses. I know her well and I'll tell you what I think it is: she thinks she knows best about everything so she doesn't listen to anybody else. She lives in a fantasy world where she thinks nothing bad will ever happen to them. If it was my name on the homeowners deed she would already be gone. Since it's my dad who owns the house on paper and he doesn't take this seriously I'm going to have to resort to more creative options to make her so
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 47
    kitten outside, half-hiding behind tall grass, looking at something outside of frame
    via Komuso

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 48
    Primarycolors 1 Do not do this. It would most likely be seen as elder abuse. Just talk to your dad and evict her. Let her kids figure it out.
    via Primarycolors1
  • 49
    OP SayJudge Judy Yeaaahhh you're 100% right. I won't. It's a nice thought sometimes though.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 50
    sn000zy NOR. Did you find your kitty? I love cats. My cats are mine and my husbands babies. We are actually very weird about having guests in our house based on how they feel about strangers. We give them filtered water and raw food, the best of everything to give them a comfortable life. If someone let them out, they would be banned from our house.
    via sn000zy
  • 51
    OP S y Judge Judy Yeah they are all safe and sound. I was able to get her in pretty quickly that morning. Even though I pay all the bills it's my dad's name on the deed and he's also got a case of not taking this stuff seriously or listening to me. Typical still seeing me as a child boomer attitude. I really want her out but I'm not sure how to go about it or what legal rights | have. Idk I'll come up with something because I am done with a capital D. She's going to be gone until after Christmas
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 52
    Just_Log_8528 "We have one rule and she repeatedly breaks it" Kick her the fuck out
    via Just_Log_8528
  • 53
    Chance_tolive hahah change the keys to your house and not let her in. i get that she's old but if she keeps doing that even after having a explosive argument, she's intentionally being rude
    via Chance_tolive
  • 54
    rebeccaglow NOR, and at this point her repeatedly letting your cats out into literal predator territory isn't forgetfulness. it's deliberate disrespect, and you need to change the locks before she gets them killed.
    via rebeccaglow
  • 55
    Gardengoddess0421 No. She's had hundreds of warnings. Her stuff will be waiting on the porch when she gets back. Anyone who has a problem with that can take her in. NOR.
    via Gardengoddess0421
  • 56
    OP Soy Judge Judy Thank you all for commenting and sharing your thoughts and ideas. I'm gonna close the comments now because I've got my answer - I'm definitely not overreacting and need to take some steps to transition her to a new living situation, with somebody who isn't me! Thank you all again. All cats are safe and she's gone till after Christmas so I'll make a plan of action during this time.
    via Se*yJudgeJudy
  • 57
    woman is hugging her cat, cat looks at her loveingly
    via SeventyFour

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

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feud Forest family drama drama niece reddit story family feud aio aunt domestic old people angry family Reddit Cats entitled people
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